I Really Don't Miss It (OK. Some Days I Miss It)

     It's an honest answer when asked (as I am ...about once a week) -- "Do you miss it?" ("It" being my 20 years of broadcasting.)
     My answer is an honest one: "No. Not really. I miss the people...I miss the conversations. But I don't miss the angst nor the anger."
     Was it fun interviewing presidential hopefuls and best selling authors? You betcha~  I stumbled into a career that afforded me one-on-one conversations with the bold and the beautiful (the radio equivalent being more like the ballsy and the brilliant, but you get the picture...)
      When given a shot at co-hosting what was once Nashville's longest running political talk show, I jumped on it like a fly on butter. It was a journalist grad's dream come true...everything I had trained for.
       I'd love to tell you I was a natural going in. Truth be told, in my 20s I had more opinions than brains.  But the beauty of talk radio is, it only takes one caller to set you straight. You'll tuck tail like a puppy in thunderstorm when challenged on what you don't know. It took some serious mentoring to make me feel safely myself in front of microphones (a task doubly hard for girls raised in the south-- born and bred to people-please from day one~ Not a plus in a talk radio profile, btw... Talk demands controversy, just FYI)
      That I survived my first year, much less the next 20, is a miracle. Credit is due the good Lord above and my mentor and one I would eventually have the honor of calling co-host, business partner and friend. Thanks to Teddy Bart (and a very patient Nashville audience), I grew up in front of eyes that could judge, ears that could hear...all while they drove to work each day.
     But life has its defining moments (as Dr. Phil would say). Had I paid close attention, certain clues might've served as fair warning...
     Like when a program director (about my age) advised, "The more hate mail you generate, the safer your job security~" (as if intentionally trying to tick people off each morning was my waking up goal in life).
      Another was when one of our backers (read: someone supposedly on "our" side) asked if I might  save the planet on someone else's dime. Seems my PollyAnna outlook wasn't making for great talk. So what if I believed that microphones were an honor and anyone working behind them had a calling? I was about focusing light on problems to make way for solutions. I viewed political (read: slimey) issues to be like cockroaches ...Flip a light -- make 'em scurry. To me, this was a calling...and one worth fighting for.
     For most (not all, but definitely the majority) talk is purely about numbers. Since these were the ones signing my check, well, we agreed to do it their way. Forget that answers are a buzz-kill and solutions don't make for great drama. News-worthy items are negative in nature...and we like it like that. We're a nation that suckles on problems. Toss us answers and we yawn. We flip the channel to something more stimulating. News (as we know it) is not about solutions.  And talk radio is certainly not.  Stick to problems, Evins. You'll be fine.  Conflict sells. Keep things stirred.
     (But for the record, this kind of day-to-day outlook cannot NOT affect your soul.)
     The good news is, I cut my teeth on the toughest meat there is, and I cut 'em early. To now converse/talk/ interview those whose lives really ARE about solutions, well, maybe God had a plan after all....
      To be clear, there are leaders who view their roles as solution-driven...those who view their roles as a calling...a ministry. Whether their family/friends...the media/the system view it this way is irrelevant, but let me state here I have met some sincerely good people who view public service as just that --"serving" ... Sadly, I've not met nearly enough.
      Sadly, servants are the minority when it comes to politics. Seems something happened on the way to the bank. They may've campaigned like they're one of us... But more often than not, they return home as someone we never knew...
      Today's memorial for John Seigenthaler was a hodgepodge of my past with a few still in my present. A mixture from all sides...a TBT of major proportion (and to think it's only Monday)
      Ironically, in reflecting on this day, it was Teddy who pointed out that today marked the 10th anniversary of our show's end. That it fell on the very same day we eulogized a man truly about fair and balanced journalism is meaningful to me. That John Seigenthaler was a dear friend...well, that makes this moment all the more significant.
      Today found me once again toe-to-toe with senators, congressmen, governors and councilmen. There were also pundits, press types and lobbyists. Only John Seigenthaler could've brought together such a lot.
     For all he meant to my life personally, I am grateful....touched...moved to tears. John was the first to suggest I audition for TV when his own son got a break to go national. He was the first to introduce this girl, otherwise, content to lay low behind the scenes, to high society and Belle Meade ...fancy balls and galas...friends of his I came to know as friends and not just show guests.
     Granted, it's a far cry from the goat-raisin' / garden growin' life I live today. But were it not for my other life, how would I/could I come to cherish my life today as deeply as I do.
     So heres to you John Seigenthaler... My memories and my gratitude run deep. Rest in peace dear soul. You have touched many lives...that mine is among them humbles me beyond words.
   
     Till we meet again--
     God bless you.
     I Thank you.
     Always~

      k